pray

birthday passed d.. not a very grand 1 but a special 1. not gonna to blog bout it over here. bcoz i wish to see tat in another blog. of cos i hope it is nt written by myself as well. hoping for miracle??

prayin hard. May god bless my family esp my dad. hope everything will b fine. please. *finger-cross*

emo swing

i think u wont read this blog before my bday. so i can write at here... u ask me dun tell u wat i wan.. i nvr plan tellin u also. bcoz i knew even i tell u cant make it...

wat i wn?
i wan to b like last time.. u celeb my bday wit me in BBQ plaza..
i wan to go chilli's restaurant to hav a try...
i wan to hear u singing happy birthday song for me..
i wan to eat ice cream wit u..
i wan a nice sweet bday blog entry wit sweet pics..
i wan u by my side...

u said BBQ plaza is nt nice, chilli's is expensive, u dun eat sweet things... ur rejections.. just so mean to me..

i knew y u duwan.. bcoz u did all tis wit her... u went bbq plaza n chilli's wit her.. brought her for icecream n choc..

can i cry?

game over?

End of semester break = Game over?

hopefully, this time i will b wrong in this guessing game..

GUdbye to misery life?

seem like my blog is dead for so long. i m jz so not in mood to update anything or perhaps my life is just too dull, so i got nothing special that i could update here..

went a short trip wit f6 frens to sepang last 2 weeks. it was nice n relaxing. how i wish i can b there alwiz...

i duno y.. but i knew for those who noe wat is goin on, for sure they will say me noob. ya. i dunno y i will go bek to d same person tat ever hurt me. i should stay far from him o as well ignore him but i jz cant make it. haiz. i knew love is better to leave broken den forcing ourselves to make it bek together. i duno. chance has been given, can i see wat i wn? nope.. i jz kip feel down.. i duno y m i giving myself hope while i noe i will b despair soon.. god.. lead me out of d misery life pls..

if i m reli important to u, u should be able show me it to me. But i cant see.. izzit bcoz i m blind? o u jz too stingy to show it to me?

颜色

你喜欢白色

而我只钟情于紫色

在光学里，

白色是由七种颜色组成的

红，橙，黄，绿，蓝，靛，紫

所以你不会为了紫色而停下脚步

红色的你

充满了危险性

再温和的你

也有暴怒 的时候

生气的你

不多话，不理人

让人 手足无措

橙色的你

就像阳光般暖和

听着你的安抚

看着你的微笑

烦恼似乎都不见了

难道你的笑带有魔法？

黄色的你

偶尔扮演着一语惊醒梦中人的角色

就像交通灯的黄色

一闪一闪地警惕着路人

在我迷惑时

你为我照明四周

让我走出迷惘

绿色的你

就像绿色植物般养眼

你温和的语气

让人与你在交谈时感到舒服

也许你就像大树般

散发出让人觉得可靠的感觉吧

蓝色的你

无论是度量还是学识

都像天空般的广阔

你看得很远

从不优柔寡断

在你的面前

我就像是个自找烦恼的小孩

靛色的你

偶然散发出神秘感

想一一的探讨

却裹足不前

因为害怕在搜索的过程中误踩地雷

紫色的你

是我没见过的

那会是罗曼蒂克的你吗？

也许紫色对于白色而言

只是一个

稍闪即逝的过客

守护天使?

以为是守护天使的他不见了。。。

累

It's u purposely wanna get things tat u cant get

这是朋友对我说的话。 是真的吗？ 我不知道， 是自己好高骛远吗？我并不贪心， 我只是想追求最好的。。。

累了， 想休息了。。 所有的不如意都挥不去，怎么办？

最后的尝试， 如果你没发现，那我就放弃了。。。

好累了， 不想再一旁继续等待， 所以我总是成为主动的那个。。。

但是我累了， 不想再主动了。。。

如果我不找你而你不会来找我， 那我算知道你的答案了

也许对你而言，我只是一个在普通不过的朋友。。。

我不坚强， 我好累。。。。

090710

wat is so special bout today ler?? LOL.. 1st time i used d kitchen in my hse n complete a dish totally by my own.. haha.. actually ntg much... just tat i woke up early in d morning.. SNEAKED into d kitchen n prepared that when my mum was out for exercise...

ya.. today is her birthday.. in my mind, when i was stil a child.. mum used to cook me d "Sweet mee sua" on my birthday... but i nvr see her eating tat on her own birthday... n so i decided to cook her tat.. a simple food but way to show my appreciation to her.. lol...

as expected when she got bek, she just asked m i too free?? HMPH!! but still she finished tat.. i knew it would not taste nicer den her cooking.. but just i felt nice when i saw her eating tat... should b quite long tat she nvr eat tat on her birthday d ba? she alwiz b d 1 tat prepare everythin for us..

Mummy.... Happie birthday!! wish ya stay healthy n pretty alwiz!!

i heartz ya.. (altho i alwiz being notty in front of u)

mission impossible...

can i tranform tis to sumting tat i wanna make??

challenge mode: ON

wish tat i could make it.....

currently havin busy life.. piles of jobs all cum together... haiz.. when only i can finish it?

Nuffnang~~

today i just got an email from Nuffnang, the content is:

This is to inform you that banners for a Durex campaign will be running on your blog from 28th June onwards. The ad campaign has sexual health related content and may be offensive to some. Your blog was selected based on the age and blog content filters in our system.

well, for me i m ok wit it.. how bout u all?? if u all feel it might be offensive to u when u view my blog.. mayb u can pm me.. so i will deactivate it for u.. =)

update soon...

need or want?

i m being so lazy and busy lately... so my blog is so dead... haix

this semester reli is a hectic sem.. i feel tired n tensed up.. but no1 is here for me... i dun reli askin much, jz hope tat there is sum1 b there for me.. listen to me when i m down.. but seem like no1 is doin so... sigh..

havin 3 midterm tis week.. which is killin me.. i reli cant make it..

things alwiz change.... why m i so stupid to think everythin wil remain d same? everythin is changing... i m d only 1 tat dunno only.. sienz...

If u need me but duwan me, that is when I'll stay.

However, if u wan me but no longer need me, that's when I'll leave.

but how if u duwan n dunit me at all? ADIOS BERAMBUS me...

忘记

墙上的钟滴答滴答地走着

窗外的雨哗啦哗啦地下着

时间一分一秒的流逝

雨势却不曾减弱……

紧握拳头的手

不急不缓地

渗出鲜红的血液

狭小的房间里

瞬间充满血腥味…

而我

从镜子里

看见自己的倒影

一副皮笑肉不笑的样子

原本只想以捶打墙壁来发泄

但却因用力过度

而受伤了…

而,

墙上也印上一个个血印…

但,

为何身体所承受的痛

竟远远不及心灵上的痛?

这真的是你想要的吗?

一直以来

你都知道我心系于你

可是你却选择假装不知道

一直与我处于暧昧阶段

我不介意

因为我以为

只要能陪在你身边就足够了

远近都不重要

是因为人的贪念吗?

还是因为我每看你一眼

想把你留在身边的念头

就越强烈?

渐渐的,

我不再满于现状

既然

我知道我和你是没有可能的

我也不想强求

而唯有退而求其次

努力和你保持距离

不想让自己越陷越深

希望选择了忘记的我

能让自己好过

让思绪回归平复…

:+: 紫雁:+:

left out

I'm the one tat choose to leave

or

I'm the one tat being left out??

single o double?

if love can be measured, can v ever know the value of it?

Wondering all the while.. actually it is easy to start a new relationship, the hard part is to maintain it.. sometimes i jz feel tat to start n leave a relationship is so dramatically, or very easy as tho there is just an ON or OFF button for it. As long as u can find d button den u got it! the disadvantage is v could hardly find the button of "AUTO". if u guys did use any electrical appliances, den u should know the function of tat AUTO button. ya.. once the food is done cooking, by switchin to the auto condition, it will help u kip warm o took cook it again when it is cool.. so if v can find this button in love, den v can maintain love easily.. but it is hard .. =(

so,

we don't need some1 to make us whole, is better to stay single than being together den getting miserable and frustated...

dun love for a reason.. let the reason be love..

fever on ip man?

ya, this time i was kinda slow.. slow in updating myself to new movies n also towards my blog...

IP MAN 2 was so chun..

n i jz love it..

i love IP MAN aka Donnie Yen..

i love tis scene too...

last but not least....

HE IS JUST RELI YENG!!

CHUN!!

Year 2 3rd SeM

yeap.. i m alr in my year 2 3rd sem rite now.. so fast? another 2 more sem den i will b doin my intern.. den i can graduate jor..

wat i wanna do after tat? further study? i m nt tat smart.. work? can i get d job tat i like??

i duno wat i wanto be...

i m jz tired..

过客

一直以来

小心翼翼的

不去触碰裂痕

天真的以为

时间会冲淡一切

可是

裂痕还是存在的

越是刻意地忽视它

它越是深深的烙印在你心里

曾经的友情

随风而散

无力挽留

没能挽留

即使想挽留

应该只会是

热脸贴着冷屁股

的尴尬场面吧

不想自讨没趣

人生旅途中

人来人往

我曾想珍惜你

但你选择做个过客

来来往往

往往来来

何去何从？

random

宁可孤单一个人，

也不愿自己委屈就全；

宁可学会独自承担，

也不愿再依赖任何人；

宁可有悲观的想法，

也不想对任何事抱有太大的希望，

宁可学会放手，

也不愿再被人放弃；

宁可自私一点，

也不想再让任何人伤害...

不知足

昔日的我

很单纯, 很幼稚

现在的我

较情绪化…

但唯一没变的是

我还是那么容易流泪

只是对哭的见解不一样了

以前的我认为哭是懦弱的行为

现在的我却认为

不能哭的人比常哭的人还要痛苦

因为哭能解放心里的压力及悲哀

但是我心里却有份遗憾

因为往昔的我,

比现在的我大方, 疑心较少

虽然现在的我长大, 学着成熟了

但我却比以往小气, 疑心重

难道人在得到一样东西后,

就会失去了另一样东西吗?

我试着找回以往的天真, 大方

却找不回…

也许,

人越想得到一样东西

就越会失去它…

* * * *

其实每个人的生命都会有遗憾

为了让沉重的生活变得轻盈

只有不让自己与那些缺憾正面相对

所以不是每一次的逃避都是因为懦弱

* * * *

针未抵达最深处

不知觉的痛得以证明

付出的只是霎那的深情

不足以成立任何内心曾经的承诺

唯有

让它一一成为过去

然后渐渐消失

现在的我

只想学习仙人掌

为自己筑起一座堡垒

在别人伤害我之前先保护自己

提醒自己

其实我是个幸福的人

只是不知足

~紫雁~

累

有心却无力

有泪却不能流

有口却说不出声

原来

我一直高估自己

把手放开原来不简单。。。

舍得， 舍得

有舍才有得

我不舍的话

你哪来的得？

我真的真的好累。。。

不变的仍然是

当我开始依赖某个人时

那人都会离我而去。。。

无奈。。。

dong dong qiang!!

weeeeeee....

here i m again....

yaaaa.. CNY is coming..

but wth i gt a test on tml, where i din study at all yet..

god aaaaaa......

willl burn mid9 oil tonite den i m free to enjoy my 1 week holiday jor..

n.. i went for nail art... hahaa.. ya.. for cny...

blur?? perhaps tis 1 is better...

i m so so in d holiday mood!!

will update again once i gt d time.. LOL

i m so LOST!!

m i being too mean?

i dun think i m..

i m jz treating u all wit d ways u guys used to treat me..

i wanna b gud to u guys too..

but how u all response??

as tho i m an outsider..

u guys jz being unfair...

y things seem so diff?

bias...

is d only word tat i can think of...

i duwan to b mean to u all.. but..

how m i goin b gud to u when i knew u all like to talk behind me?

ya,

call me petty den!

darknesssss

sob... i think.. i was not in a vy good luck month or year... sigh.. planned a so called surprise but end up tak jadi... everything is done d, but a problem just sud pop out den everything gone... i just cant defeat d destiny o fate?? i jz wish tat i m able to give a lil surprise to a fren.. yet tak jadi also.. useless me?? sigh... feelin down all the while... i can only kip d plan till next time d... sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

missing a friend...

i found out tat everytime when i was down. i feel like talkin to you..

as tho u r d only 1 tat will understand wat m i goin to tell...

as tho only u r d only 1 tat i can trust

as tho u r d 1 tat ale to cheer me up...

i miss u alots... hope u r doin fine... take care...